Tag Archives: freethought

Eyeliner, Men, and Judgemental People

It totally sucks that my job takes up so much of my time. We’ve been working 10 hour days this week. Sucky. One of the worst parts is that I sit here at my desk and come up with marvelous ideas for blog posts, then forget them/don’t have time to write them/don’t have the energy to do anything when I’m done with work. I miss blogging!

I do have something to write about and, oddly, time to do it. The end of the month is busy in finance except when it’s not.

There is a man here, at my work, that wears eyeliner. He could identify as something other than a man, but I have no way of knowing that so I’m afraid I’ll have to continue with my assumptions for ease of writing.

I work at a large company – there are between 3,000 and 6,000 employees in this building all working for one company. When someone does or wears something “different,” they often become the-man(or woman)-who-blank. Occasionally they acquire a name like Crazy Phil, but that’s a different story. I’d like to talk about the-man-who-wears-eyeliner (or tmwwe).

First I want to say this: tmwwe, that eyeliner looks awesome on you.

Second I want to say: even if the eyeliner didn’t look awesome, there’s nothing wrong with the man wearing it.

I saw tmwwe for the first time some weeks ago. I honestly thought, “Is that man wearing eyeliner?!… Actually, it looks pretty good, and who the hell cares if men choose to wear eyeliner?”

Tmwwe then came up in conversation at lunch, although I had nothing to do with bringing up the subject. The people I work with can be a bit gossippy. I regret that I didn’t really participate in the conversation. They made fun of tmwwe. They said mean things about how “it’s just wrong” for men to wear eyeliner. You can probably imagine what their remarks sounded like. I regret that I didn’t speak up; in my head I responded with, “What’s wrong with a man wearing eyeliner? I actually think it looks pretty good, and even if it didn’t it’s not like it hurts anyone.” I wish I had said it aloud.

There is nothing wrong with men wearing eyeliner. Nevermind the fact that major male stars wear eyeliner relatively often (Brandon Flowers from the Killers, anyone?). Nevermind the fact that in some industrialized countries it’s perfectly acceptable for men to wear makeup. And nevermind all the other facts that make a man wearing eyeliner no big deal.

I want to focus on one thing, and one thing only: what reason can you give me for thinking it’s not okay for men to wear eyeliner? I don’t want something arbitrary, and I’d highly recommend avoiding anything that can be responded to with, “If all your friends jumped off a cliff, would you do it to?” I also want to qualify this by saying I’m not asking for reasons why an individual male would choose not to wear eyeliner (i.e. he doesn’t want to deal with the crap that goes with it). I want a real reason why it’s somehow a problem for men to wear it.

I doubt you can come up with anything.

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What I’ve Been Reading: April 5

JREF on the increase in the rate autism diagnosis. This is a great explanation of why the increase in the rate of diagnosis doesn’t necessarily mean an increase in the prevalence of autism.

Killer Homeopath” from the Skeptic Detective.

Students at DeLaSalle High School in Minneapolis didn’t like the negative view of single-parent families and families with adopted children that the Minneapolis Archdiocese delivered at an assembly. This website focuses on the anti-gay part of the message, but I would say the students’ response to all of the negative messages are important. FYI: children of married parents are not better than children without married parents.

Rough day? Here’s your answer!

Yes, we should remove “In God We Trust” from US money.


Women on Wikipedia.

Sound waves to detect landmines. A low cost way to detect mines. 🙂

Using juvenile blood to help old people? A little weird, but okay. Using juvenile blood as a performance enhancer? Messed up.

Because it’s so damn important to believe in a central idea that someone else defines and many people believe in and creating a community around a shared idea is wrong! (sarcasm) Oh, and all that statistical evidence that atheists are one of the least trusted, most hated groups in the US? That’s all our imagination. That attempt to be incredibly careful not to inadvertently reveal your atheism lest your possible future employers throw you out of applicant pools? Also our imagination. Feel free to criticize what various leaders in the atheist movement have said. Feel free to criticize over-identification with the Civil Rights Movement, though I know no atheist who thinks they have it anywhere near as rough as those fighting for their rights in the ’60s. But don’t throw out our evidence-based claims, too. Don’t misunderstand that not believing in god makes it pretty near impossible to have any time when you can speak about religion without a mega-filter on your mouth, a filter that most religious people will never understand.*

Santorum: Still delusional. Just in case you needed an update and thought maybe he had come to his senses.

Humongous Fuzzy Dinosaur Unearthed in China.”

What I’ve learned about apartments in historic buildings: I will probably never have one. They all seem to be for low-income artists or rich people. Can someone explain why on Earth you are even allowed to designate low-income housing as specifically for “artists”?

Business majors: worthwhile or not?

No, I do not want to wear my computer on my face. “Do something else.” Haha. I always think of that episode of Futurama when everyone gets their phone surgically inserted into their head (or eye? I don’t remember) and it is then used for mind control.

Aaaannd just to amuse you: the glasses phenomenon.

Props to the Morning Heresy, where I found some of the above links. Also to Skepchick for Skepchick Quickies 4.5

*Sorry for that verbose response. Bit annoyed.

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I am: independent, atheist, feminist.

I am not usually reliant on ideology. I do my best to think independently and figure out what is right in that manner, rather than relying on what other people say or relying on doctrines of different groups. I am a political independent, I am an atheist with a lowercase a, I am a feminist.

When I say I am an independent, I mean I try to avoid relying on what the major parties say about candidates. I avoid depending on partisan websites to find my information (or I attempt to find multiple sources). When I vote, I don’t vote on the basis of party affiliation unless that’s the only information available, in which case I often don’t fill out that part of the ballot at all. I never vote on party lines.

When I say I am an atheist with a lowercase a, I am not taking shots at Atheists or New Atheists. I am simply saying that while I identify as atheist and do so openly, I do not identify as such to place myself in a group. I feel that if there is an identifiable group of Atheists, capital letter intended, I am not a part of it. My primary reason for identifying as an atheist is actually to demonstrate to the world that the idea of atheists as immoral essentially sociopathic people is wrong. I am a good, moral, polite, accepting atheist and I think for myself.

When I say I am a feminist, the only principle of feminism I recognize is equality. I say I am a feminist because I believe in equality. Male, female, cisgender, transgender, homosexual, heterosexual, queer, or whatever, I believe in equality. I only recently found out that some feminists have mega issues with the trans community, especially transwomen and even more recently actually saw a direct example of women calling themselves feminists exhibiting a scary amount of transphobia.* I can’t even believe how lost the primary message of feminism is to these people. I’m horrified that a person could think that in an attempt to eliminate patriarchy, feminists should reject all potential transwomen as allies and instead denounce them as some sort of enemy. The feminism I believe in isn’t a war against men in which transwomen are treated like spies, if it’s a war at all, it’s a war for equality.

*I’d link to it, but I don’t really want to give them site traffic, no matter how negligible.

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Thirty Day Book Challenge #10: Book that changed your life

A book that changed my life? There are plenty of books that changed my life, some in bigger ways than others. I think I will talk about two books/series that changed my life and leave it up to the reader to decide what “wins.” This is not an exhaustive list, but thinking of books that “changed my life” is rather difficult. Mostly, books have had gradual effects on my life with many books changing me over long periods of time. To point to one and say, “this changed my life,” isn’t very appropriate for me.

Jane Eyre changed my life. I read it for the first time in middle school (actually, I read an abridged version in second or third grade, but didn’t read the full version until middle school). How did it change my life? It alerted me to my love of nineteenth century British literature. It might not sound like a big deal, but reading Jane Eyre led to reading all of Jane Austen’s works, all of Charlotte Bronte’s works, Anne Bronte’s works, Wuthering Heights, North & South, and numerous other works from that time period. For two years in high school this area of fiction was my primary source of reading material. These books had a big effect on my vocabulary, my writing style, and my understanding of certain periods of history. I love books more because of these particular authors and titles (except W.H., bleh). They have affected my taste in movies and my enjoyment of other books. I even think in British spelling.*

The Golden Compass and its sequels also changed my life. I was not raised in a religious household, but I did believe in god. See my “Amanda Became an Atheist” page for a more in depth explanation, but the gist is that reading those three Philip Pullman books made me question religion and belief in a much stronger way than before. They were a catalyst for freethought. Important, no?

*That statement might not make sense to many of you. It is, admittedly, quite odd. An illustration: More than once I’ve been taking notes in class and seen “behavior” on the board, mindlessly copied the word, then looked down to see “behaviour.”

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