You may recall my post from a little over a month ago about the song “Jesus take the wheel.”
I know I didn’t make quite enough fun of it last time, so I thought I’d add this little thought.
Nevermind how incredibly arrogant it is to think that the savior of your religion has time to deal with your inability to keep driving your motor vehicle properly down the road or how horrible it is that you would risk not only your own life, but the lives of other drivers by giving up control over your car without knowing if your god will be able to immediately take over.
Why would you pick Jesus?
Being objective, if Jesus lived he never drove a car. He probably never drove a horse and cart, even. Of all people to give over control of a motor vehicle to, Jesus is one of the worst choices. Driving isn’t exactly hard, but it does take some skill. And in a scary emergency when you decide to give over control of your car to a dead person/spirit/whatever, I think you could pick a lot more wisely than a carpenter from two thousand years ago.
Dale Earnhardt would probably be happy to help if his soul/spirit/whatever isn’t too busy. He died in a car crash, but he can probably handle your low-speed drama.